The Dismal Oubliette(#2006RJ)
Dark, musty, wet...
The only colors here are stony greys and rusty browns, with ominous but unidentifiable flecks of red. The only hint of life is green from algae. The prevalent sound is that of ductwork, thin windy oscilations, uncomforting even at the thought of the air it brings.
Everything seems industrial, but nothing works.
Variable dimly stares ahead, perched upon Eli's shoulders.
Eli sets you down, and just sits in front of you, trying to think healing thoughts.
A girl, safe and protected, virginal and lovely, loved by all and harmed by none.
A smile briefly shoves its way onto the gecko's face, as she stares through Eli. She seems to receive the thoughts, but the message isn't quite getting through yet. Instead it's making her little dreamworld pleasant, at least.
Eli just leans against you, shaping your dreams. A ferret sits down beside you, made of cloudstuff, and holds your hand, both you and he gloved. "I won't let you be hurt any more," it says with conviction.
Variable murmurs something unintelligible in response, a dreamy smile fading onto her face. She lies back, suddenly, and appears quite comfortable. One must wonder what else she's thinking.
Eli bites his lips, looking over you, and his thoughts trail down a fantasy in the space of a millisecond - peeling down that zipper, licking you to orgasm - before he suppresses it. Quietly, he brushes your cheek. "I'll protect you," he murmurs.
Variable's brow furrows for a moment, the expression displaying slight displeasure. "Ooh," She mumbles suddenly, and the gecko's red-orange eyes open slightly, peering through half-closed eyelids at Eli. They speak of significantly larger awareness than moments before. "I had a wonderful dream," she mumbles quietly, somehow appearing rested. "You were in it, but you were made of clouds, 'n we were talking 'n stuff... you said a lot of nice things." She wrinkles her nose. "But then you started... doing things to me, and that's how I knew it was a dream... You'd never do that, so I knew and I... I woke up..." She smiles sweetly, innocently.
Eli sighs, cupped around you like this. "I wish it didn't... terrify you so much. Most people... don't mean to hurt you with it. You're such a nice girl, you don't deserve what you've been through... Nobody does."
Eli holds your hand gently. "Why are we so alone, even when we're together...?"
"Too much of a good thing..." Variable muses in a rather detached manner. "I guess that it wasn't scary at one time... when I thought it was my future, my purpose." She runs a green hand through lovely, feathery platinum hair. "I've done a lot in my life I'm not proud of, and a lot has been done to me. I really try to move on and forget. But my... handicap makes that difficult." She frowns somewhat sternly, and appears wise beyond her years, suddenly. This is the true Variable, the one hiding beneath the mask of innocence; a tough woman, hardened by bad times, who only wants to start over.
Eli looks to you, and sees you're sane again. "Story of my life," he mutters. "I've fallen in love with you. But I've been Besax so long, I hardly know how to stop... What was I thinking, giving you that knife?"
Eli caresses over your hand. "...I have something horrible to admit. You might want to kill me afterwards."
Variable appears taken aback for a moment, her eyes wide with surprise at Eli's admission of love. She suddenly smirks, however, smacking herself on the forehead and then shaking her head. "No, I'm not going to hide this time," she mutters to herself mockingly. She appears remarkably sober and aged- not physically aged, but the sudden change in her demeanor suggests a personality which has seen much. "You're not the first, oh no. Not at all. But usually that just meant that someone was willing to pay extra." She laughs, a sarcastic manner entering her. "That's the past, though, it really is. And I'm bracing myself, so go ahead and admit what you must."
Eli looks away, a little rattled. "...In my previous existence, as Besax, I held about 20% of Tritus Labs' stock. I've known about... everything. Before Besax left me, he was planning to... use you, for awful tasks."
You say, "When I saw you again, I just... I remembered so much of it. I wanted to - to do something, anything to try and make it up to you."
While the usual Variable would have reeled back at the comment, eyeing Eli with strong distrust and bitter hatred, this Variable merely says, rather nonchalantly, "But you aren't Besax anymore." A sweet, nostalgic smile creeps onto her face. "And besides, you've done your best to make up for it, to show this love you have for me. That's really all you /can/ do," She reasons emphatically.
Eli smiles weakly, hopefully. "I... I was hoping you'd say that," he murmurs quietly. "I've got... feelings for you that you probably wouldn't be comfortable with. I don't know what to do about them." He scratches as the rust on the floor, child-like and lost. "I think Inhatti will leave you alone now. I don't know. I hope."
Eli, when he isn't faking being Besax, isn't much to look at, isn't much to listen to, isn't much there.
"I'm afraid you're right," Variable says solemnly, frowning a little. "One thing I am totally true about is my... aversion to that activity these days. I do appreciate the feelings, though. I know they aren't of the same origins as many of the people who wished to buy me for a night."
Eli blushes brightly. "You're really pretty," he whispers softly. "But I want to make you happy. I know it's... it's not your fault that it's so bad for you. I didn't know you were so... together, about things, on the inside." He scratches your name on to the rusted floor, then scratches it out. "I'm sorry I told Inhatti your secret."
Variable grimaces solemnly at Inhatti's mention. "I have no idea about that... thing," she mutters bitterly, her eyes closing tight with hurt for a moment, revealing that the innocent mask, a mask or not, is still a strong part of this girl. "She can hurt me, and likes to, it seems. I... I guess I was out of control there. But I just wanted so badly to do what she'd done to me... I wanted to cause her so much pain and anguish. I didn't want to believe that she'd enjoy such a thing." A sigh. "I don't like my secret getting out... in the past it's resulted in it being abused. I guess I'm a pretty experienced creature as a result of it, though... but I'd give anything to really have my innocence back. My ways come pretty close, though."
Eli nods quietly. "Maybe... Maybe you can help me. If I could learn how to... how to hold on to myself, as well as you can, then maybe I can find who I am, instead of just who Besax is." He wedges the knife between two plates in the floor, looking at you. "I won't let Inhatti hurt you," he says, in his own voice.
Eli stands up, slowly. "I spend days in here, you know? Inhatti, Sosael, she blew out my head with a void cannon. healed Besax and Besax healed me. I can't remember most of it. I can't remember a lot of things."
Variable shakes her head, looking up at Eli, her eyes exuding sympathy. "I don't really know quite how I can help... but I can try, I can always try." She wrinkles her nose a little, scratching the back of her head idly. "What ever happened to suddenly put you in control, and not Besax, anyway?"
Eli giggles quietly, sitting down. "He got fried by accident," he says happily. "Clockwork zapped him with an overpowered tasp and all his tentacles withered up and died and blew away in the wind!"
You say, "I can't even remember who Clockwork is."
You say, "It took me so long to remember how to think my thoughts instead of his."
Variable stands up, too, and clasps the ferret's hands in hers. "Between you and me, I'm awfully glad you learned." She smiles hopefully, her tone suddenly optimistic and almost cheery. "That's the first step... the first step to being only Eli, and never Besax. You've got it in you... I know you do." She says this with a trusting, mature naivete, proving that even the more sober gecko is not devoid of her ability to trust beyond her means.
Eli's face lights up with the purest joy he has experienced since Besax's departure - not the strongest, not by far, but the purest, the most rarefied and unsullied, for there is no Besax in it.
Eli gently embraces you, eyes shut.