Foster W. Hearst

Roving Reporter and Editor-In-Chief, The Notional Topper

Now this is a charicature if ever there has been one. This is an anthropomorphic squirrel, about four and a half feet tall, clad in white button-down shirt, black slacks, black tie and a somewhat oversized brown trenchcoat. A brown fedora hat adorns his head, with a slip of paper displaying the word "PRESS" prominently stuck on.

The trenchcoat makes him look far, far larger than he really is, as the pockets are crammed full of all sorts of papers, some crinkled as though they've been rejected, others obviously shoved in while rushed, still others very carefully slipped into oversized pockets.

The last point of note comes when his tail becomes visible. Attached haphazardly to the end of his tail is a large flat board; attached to that is a ramshackle typewriter. Evidently this is his means of keeping a writing desk nearby.

His paws and his "desk" are covered in black blotches from ink stains, as are parts of his trenchcoat. He's not the most reputable looking person in the world. He's frequently running around, and looks extremely rushed. But he has his job to do.

This is Foster W. Hearst. The Editor In Chief. And he will GET THE STORY, on his honor as a roving reporter.

Our Editor-In-Chief's And Our Paper's Distinguished History

Foster W. Hearst is, as described, the editor-in-chief of, primary roving reporter for, and publisher of The Notional Topper. Citing itself as "TopWarp's Most Dependable News Service for many a Wheel", the Topper publishes irregular news updates that its editor (Foster) deems of newsworthy note to deserving citizens of TopWarp. Having been in informal operation exclusively in TopWarp for quite some time now, the Editor-In-Chief (Foster, again) has made the unprecidented decision to start distributing this fine news-paper Mess-wide, to show to its misguided cousin warps just how much of a right-thinking moral and upstanding place TopWarp is.

Formal Relations

None formally established as of yet.

Reader and Public Source Acknowledgements

• Caroline has been quite help-ful with regards to information on the place known as "The Museum", and most particularly a Library therein. THE NOTIONAL TOPPER extends its thanks to this polite citizen.

Special Reporting!

Foster is something of an elusive entity; this is not by choice, mind you, but largely because he's often so very busy getting out the next story that he doesn't have time to lounge around places.

Foster does not speak directly; it is presumed that he is mute. He communicates exclusively through his typewriter, via either specially typed messages or pretyped cards for common requests and/or comments. Said typewriter, by the way, appears to be completely indestructable; it's already survived a temper tantrum or two from Hydra Gamma.

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Current and past issues of The Notional Topper are [available via the Puzzlebox datanet].

Letters To The Editor

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