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- D : Rowdiest coder in the Mess.
- Daria : Pornstar.
- Darkon... is one of the few people who have managed to die, and make it stick.
- Dr Darlus Courbin : systems biologist and media host.
- Davan : He's an asshole. No, seriously.
- DBL321 : Repair Drone DBL321 of the Collector. Not supposed to be sentient!
- Delta : Mech-suited feline adrenaline junkie.
- Dendriphorax : An empathic telepathic talking tree who worships the Logos and the Cute.
- Discount Bin Ninja, The : An imaginary ninja from upstate New York.
- Don : The Not-So-Almighty Director.
- Downsystem : Trust in his self-righteous suicide.
- Drones : FF0000, 00FF00, 0000FF, FFFF00, FF00FF, 00FFFF. Telepresence drones that serve as guest logins.
- Echo: An independent spirit. (Write yourself into Echo's history!)
- Ecton Bob: A hound with a taste for honey and a generous disposition.
- Edgar?: Ohgod, it's spreading...
- Edmund Baxter : Bodyguard, servant, information-monger.
- Einar : So badly misplaced; so sadly obsolete.
- Eli: Besax-Lite, now with fewer inverted-evil-carbs.
- Eliahn? : Azure Fox (Not Quite There)
- Elsie?: Sister to Lunaria...sort of.
- engineskye?: Clockwork owl of great intricacy.
- Erleuchtung-Satori: Seeker/desire/changed/Strange/gentle
- Esche: Trapped under ice, comfortably cold.
- Etiel: Fluid flow of alien order.
- Evrard: A chain man
- Fade : Jackal-ghost (Mask).
- Farseeker: A seeker of souls.
- Far-spire : Ocean cephalopod turned amphibious explorer.
- Fidget? : Rider of the Orrery.
- Flea? : Maniac hunter/hunted human/rabbit.
- Flenser? : Last of the Painbringers, looking for answers in a much-changed world.
- Flyte : Starborne, singularity-spawn.
- Foolsmate : Living clay, always seeking new ways to be shaped.
- Forrest? : A miniature forest, a Gaea Gestalt in miniature
- Foster: Roving Reporter News Squirrel From TopWarp Now Exploring Mess! News-Paper Published By Same Now Similarly Exploring Mess! Seeking To Make Friends And Influence Others! WILL HIS PLAN COME TO FRUITION?!
- Frostbyte : Former war program, sometimes cultist, mostly Cassanova.
- |The Functions| : They run the world, and deserve a page all to themselves.
- Fyren : Cramming knowledge you didn't know you needed into orifices you'll soon wish you didn't have!
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